I’m-a cut you. But first I have to properly eject.

They’re doing some amazing things with USB drives these days. This image on GIZMODO caught our eye today:

It’s a USB flash drive! It’s a butterfly knife! Now you can take care of all your concealed-weapon and data-storage needs in one single purchase!

Thus inspired, we perused the internets for more amazing works of flash drive design.

Richard Gere really could have used this one in The Mothman Prophecies. Then when he said “what’s in my hand” to the mothman he was talking to on the phone, and the mothman hissed “Chhhapppp Sticcckkk!” to prove his supernatural powers, as the lip balm was bathed in picture perfect product placement lighting, Gere could have said, “Suck it Mothman! It’s a USB drive! Another Mothman hoax unmasked by the great Dick Gere!”

Mac users will love these celebrated USB drives from Art Lebedev that look just like folder icons. Just don’t spend too much time browsing around the store, or you may decide to put that $50 to a better use, like buying this “Eff The Rain” umbrella.

Finally, one more USB drive highlighted on Gizmodo:

This one really messed with blogger Dan Nosowitz’s head:

“Is capitalism really that great, if it leads to beer-filled USB flash drives with “optional customizable floating objects” inside? Should we Americans really be that pleased with our free speech, if it means I get emails from people who make flash drives with BEER in them? And am I really secure with myself as a gadget dork, getting all excited over the latest and greatest shiny toys, if that same email brags about the floating objects being in 3D? How could they be anything but 3D, when they’re actual, physical objects? I can’t pretend like the world is the same after this. The sun doesn’t shine as bright. The air doesn’t taste as sweet. Congratulations, Beer-Filled USB Drive Manufacturer. You’ve broken me.”

About Alpine McGregor
Just like you, man. I got the shotgun, you got the briefcase. All in the game, though, right?

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