Come to Moscow, wacky foreign leaders!

While our presidential candidates angrily trade barbs about who’s a socialist, the world’s most famous ex-socialists are busy planning world domination. That’s right, the ORIGINAL commies – the Russians – are up to some of their crazy tricks again, befriending all of America’s enemies, messing with our allies and hoarding all their frickin’ energy supplies.

It seems that if you’re an insane foreign leader, Putin and friends will bend over backwards to accommodate your stay in Moscow. Take North Korea’s Kim Jong-Il – although some people think he’s secretly dead now, his plans to visit Putin in 2001 were waylaid by a less impassable obstacle: his paralyzing fear of air travel. No matter — a gigantic logistical operation was staged to allow his ARMORED TRAIN to carry him on a nine-day journey to the Russian capital!

This time around, it’s Libya’s Muammar Gaddafi, who has been pretty anti-house since the Americans bombed the crap out of his presidential compound in the 80s. Seems Gaddafi likes to sleep outside in a tent, ostensibly to hasten the whole run-for-your-life process, and only is down to visit other countries if they make a campground available.

According to REUTERS, Putin was all, “Pitch that shit, homie!”

“Got any s’mores, Comrade?”

MOSCOW – Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi has pitched a tent in a Kremlin garden before talks with Russian leaders on Saturday.

Gaddafi is to meet Russian President Dmitry Medvedev and Prime Minister Vladimir Putin for talks expected to focus on arms sales and access for Russian energy companies to projects in the North African state.

Located a few metres (yards) from the building where Russian President Dmitry Medvedev has his office, the military-style tent was decorated with North African fabrics and a metal barbecue grill has been set up in front, a Reuters reporter said.

A large, flat-screen television was switched on inside the tent.

So what do two world leaders do after they pitch a Bedouin tent? Go hang out with an age-appropriate babe, obviously!

Libyan leader Moamer Gaddafi spent the last evening of his official visit to Moscow on Saturday at a concert of the French singer Mireille Mathieu with one of her long-time fans – Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin.

Gaddafi is on a three-day visit to Russia, in a move expected to reprise cordial Soviet-era relations between the two states, and lead to purchases of weapons by Libya.

Putin, 56, and Gaddafi, 66 went backstage to visit the 62-year-old chanteuse, who enjoyed considerable fame in Russia in the years of the Soviet Union. The two leaders reportedly conversed with Mathieu on the topic, among others, of the beauty of Paris.

Mathieu then joined the one-time African revolutionary and the former KGB agent on a walk through the Kremlin garden to Gaddafi’s Bedouin tent, in which he customarily resides during official visits overseas, for tea, according to the Interfax news agency.

Prime Minister Putin remarked that ‘I don’t think Mireille was ever in a Bedouin tent before,’ to which Mathieu replied that one ought to make a wish when one is somewhere for the first time.

On the relationship between Russia and Libya, Putin said to Gaddafi, ‘the fact that you have pitched your tent within the Kremlin walls shows that we are now much closer together.’

At that point, international journalists were ushered out of the tent as the stereo began to play a 70s porn groove…and a tri-continental threesome of America-haters set sail for seas of pleasure.

About Alpine McGregor
Just like you, man. I got the shotgun, you got the briefcase. All in the game, though, right?

2 Responses to Come to Moscow, wacky foreign leaders!

  1. Secret M says:

    Putin and al-Gaddafi have been trading favors for years now. How else does one explain the success of the Lybian karate team in the most recent Arab Games.

    If you want to know who Putin has been canoodling with simply apply the sneaky deaky black belt test (SDBBT). For instance, Iran recently showcased its karate talents in Berlin …

    Click to access 10428-13.pdf

    Now, we all know that Putin’s public martial arts persona is as judo maven, but don’t say I didn’t warn you when secret black belts of all ilks start showing up on these shores.

  2. Pingback: Gaddafi’s Killer Virgins | Defused City

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