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Piscataquis poor effort.

Guess how many counties John McCain won in all of New England?

One. One freaking county.

So where did Johnny Mac pull it off?

Surely in his beloved state of New Hampshire, where he flew on the last weekend of the election. Oh…no? Not New Hampshire. Lost every county in New Hampshire? Well, he narrowly lost three counties, that’s like a moral victory. Sigh.

OK, one of those wealthy New York City suburbs in Connecticut. They gotta be pretty conservative there. Ohhh they all voted for Obama too?

No!! No we got it – that one congressional district in Maine worth one electoral vote that they put money into after their campaign in Michigan collapsed! God love ya, McCain, so effing mavericky!!

No, he lost that too.

The only county in ALL of New England captured by John McCain was in central Maine: Piscataquis County. This county had 17,235 people at the time of the last census. 98% white, median salary $28 grand. McCain won this county by 4,785 to 4,430.

Okay, now we feel bad for kicking a guy when he’s down. But honestly, this is unreal. The fact that Obama took virtually every county in New England is shocking.

McCain won most of the counties in states that he lost, like Pennsylvania and Virginia. Obama won more than a dozen counties in Texas, cut a swath of counties through the South, and even took four counties in McCain’s home state of Arizona. Conversely, McCain took quite a few counties in Illinois.

But in New England? Obama tossed a one-hitter through six.

And the hit was a broken bat bloop that looked like a poop.

What happened here? The Republican Party was a force in the Northeast as recently as twenty years ago.

The incompetent campaign “masterminded” by Steve Schmidt and Rick Davis takes a lot of the blame. Obama’s massive fundraising from Massachusetts and Connecticut didn’t hurt his chances in the rest of the states. Southern New Hampshire, for example, was utterly blanketed in ads through the Boston media market. The economic crisis and long Republican reign spelled defeat for the GOP on a statewide basis in a generally liberal region.

But they had McCain! His credentials going into this race had to endear him to a variety of regions throughout New England…probably not whole states, but a handful of counties at least. Didn’t happen.

The real reason for the region-wide wipeout is the social agenda of the (less populous) states that voted all their counties the other way. All two of ’em.

Culture wars used to be a winning gameplan for the Republicans, but when you get blasted this badly in a region worth 34 electoral votes, it’s time to start rethinking the Palin in 2012 strategy.

Up yours, Alaska and Oklahoma.

Signed, New England

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About Alpine McGregor
Just like you, man. I got the shotgun, you got the briefcase. All in the game, though, right?

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