Best and Worst of the Internets 2014: The Nominees!

2014TOP

It’s time for our readers & listeners to cast their ballots, determining the best and the worst of the Internets in 2014. 

The list of 50 nominees was determined after a thorough review of a year’s worth of Fortnight on the Internets podcasts and listener discussions on our Facebook page. They represent a cross-section of the year’s most notable viral items, disgraces to humanity, controversial figures, and enjoyable podcast topics, encompassing everything from videos to Tumblrs to memes to movements. Some made us laugh, some made us cry, some made us shake our fists angrily at the computer screen.

Scroll down to refresh your memory — or to learn about these stories for the first time.

10HR 29 90S 100 ADELEDAZEEM
ALEX APPARENTLY BEYONCELOGUES CASINO CHARLO
DASHCON DELICIOUSPHD DRUNKJCREW EVERYNOISE FAPPENING
GAMERGATE HIGHMAINTENANCE IAMSORRY ICEBUCKET ICEJJFISH
KACY KIDFOODREVIEWS KIMKBUTT LETSGETSOCIAL LETMEPOOP
LISTENTOWIKIPEDIA LOSFELIZ MAXIMUSTHOR MILLENNIAL MODERNLOVE
MUSICLESS MYPARENTSOPENCARRY OSCARS-SELFIE pistol-shrimps PORNHUB
RIKKWILDE RUNNINGDRAWING SADFULLHOUSE SATMORNINGSLOWJAMZ SERIAL
SHIALIVE SOCHI SOLANGE STARWARS TMNT
TOMHANKS TOOMANYCOOKS VERBATIM WESTILLCOMING YESALLWOMEN

To vote, click here.

Voting will run through 5pm on Saturday, December 13th. The votes will be tallied and the results announced in our final podcast of the year a few days later. The upper echelon of vote-getters will join our previous inductees in the Hall of Internet Fame.

Click on for a primer on the nominees in detail. 

“10 Hours of Walking in NYC as a Woman”

 

A hugely viral hidden camera video that showcased catcalling on the streets of New York. Scads of cads were busted talking dirty. Outrage, controversy, backlash and parody ensued in great measure. Discussed in episode 62.

29 Impressions Hoax

  

Youtubist Rob Cantor made like he was doing tons of impressions in a single, musical take — then revealed it all as one big hoax. Never trust an internet! And some of those impressions, woof. Discussed in episode 55.

90s Alt-Rock Vocal Hook Supercut

 

This masterblend of nostalgia,  grunge and editing skillz inspired us to hold a Vocal Hook Draft in episode 52. One of the true highlights of FOTI volume 3, if we may say so ourselves.

100 Orgasms a Day

  

This is a truly horrifying story, with video clips to match. Hard to believe this is even real. This poor, poor man. Discussed between immature giggles in episode 60.

“Adele Dazeem”

  

Never change, Travolta. (Related: Adele Dazeem Name Generator.Celebrated in episode 48.

Alex from Target

alex-from-target

A young stallion becomes the fixation of the entire English-speaking internet while innocently bagging groceries at a Texas Target. Welcome to the future. Discussed in episode 63.

Apparently Kid

This telegenic ginger kid was ready to go with a fantastic catchphrase when his 15 minutes of fame suddenly appeared. Discussed in episode 57.

The Beyoncelogues

Nina Millin’s dramatic interpretations of Queen Bey’s classics electrified the most rabid fanbase on Earth. Discussed at length on the shortly-forthcoming episode 64!

Casino’s Law

This local TV ad aired during the Super Bowl and soon went viral nationally. Don’t mess with Casino. He always wins. Discussed on episode 46.

Charlo Greene Quits on Air

This weed-loving news anchor forsook her broadcast career for a life full of fat doobies and blunts, dropping an F-bomb live for good measure. Discussed on episode 60.

Dashcon

ballpit

The Tumblr con that set a new standard for epic fail. Explored on episode 55.

“Delicious Women’s Ph.D. Darling Sexy”

delicious phd

This Halloween costume caused quite a stir among the most educated Likers, and racked up a ton of funny Amazon reviews. Intelligence is the sexiest asset of all. Mentioned on episode 62.

Drunk J. Crew

drunk_jcrew

A Tumblr that points out something few noticed before…many, many J. Crew models look like they just turned up for what. Mentioned on episode 62.

Every Noise at Once

every-noise-at-once

An astounding musical database from some Spotify back-end wizards. Discussed on episode 59.

“The Fappening” (Odious iCloud Hack)

icloud hack

No roundup of Internets 2014 should omit this item, but don’t get it twisted. This is why we can’t have nice things, like smartphones, sexting and sexy celebrities. Some creepy people are going to come along and ruin it for everyone. A strong contender for Worst of the Internets 2014. Denounced on episode 58.

Gamergate

gamergate Vivian

It’s about ethics in journalism. Nah. Another potent Worst Of contender. Dissected and demolished on episode 61.

High Maintenance

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Our favorite webseries of the year follows an amiable weed dealer through a jungle of NYC clients. Hailed on episode 55.

#IAMSORRY

iamsorry

Shia LaBeouf did an art installation, and things got really weird. Maria Blasucci reported her first-hand experience on episode 47.

Ice Bucket Challenge

ice bucket challenge

Everyone’s boss’s favorite Internet meme. Analyzed on episode 57.

IceJJFish

A song so bad, it became almost magical. Puzzled over in episode 47.

Kacy Catanzaro, American Ninja Warrior

“Mighty Kacy” inspired the entire internet by flinging her 5-foot-nothing frame with abandon around the NBC obstacle course challenge. Praised on episode 56.

Kid Food Reviews

french-laundry-600x450

The Bold Italic’s series of little-kid fine-dining reviews peaked with this adorable child’s visit to the famed French Laundry. Mused over in episode 58.

Kim Kardashian’s Oiled Up Butt

kim k butt

I feel like everyone needs to vote for this, just so we can see the Hall of Fame plaque. But do as you will. Scoffed at in episode 63.

“Let’s Get Social”

A crap anthem for all internet-kind. Chortled about in episode 50.

“Let Me Poop”

A little girl delivers the definitive Frozen parody with an ode to dumps. Some things never get old. Discussed in episode 60.

Listen to Wikipedia

listen-to-wikipedia

A magical place where millions of Wikipedia edits become a soothing symphony. Who knew the activities of unknown Wikipedians could put you in mind of a day at the spa? Discovered in episode 63.

Los Feliz Day Care

Flawlessly executed Twitter account. Mentioned in episode 62.

Maximus Thor

Feels like this young man is just beginning a long run of genius internet work. Praised on episode 62.

Millennial Parents

A webseries that explores the hilariously real world of parenting for a new generation, Internet woes and all. We hosted the creators on episode 54.

Modern Love

The New York Times turned their long-running romance column into an animated webseries that tugged heartstrings and blew minds. Producer Zena Barakat joined us on episode 56.

Musicless Music Video

The best audio editing work on an internet video series since Hall of Famer Bad Lip Reading. This dissolved us in giggles in episode 54.

My Parents Open Carry

my-parents-open-carry

A book for the children of gun nuts. This inspired some truly great Amazon reviews, because of course it did. Mentioned on episode 58.

Oscars Selfie

oscars selfie

Ellen very nearly broke the Internet with this one — well, Twitter at least. Nice work by Lupita’s brother to doorcrash the image of the year. Discussed on episode 48.

The Pistol Shrimps

The greatest rec league basketball team in the world. First mention in ALL of media occurred on episode 47, when we hosted captain Maria Blasucci.

Pornhub Comments on Stock Photos

pornhub comments

This Tumblr never fails to completely slay me. Men are so gross and should probably be wiped off the earth. Discussed in episode 45.

Rikk Wilde

This Kansas City Chevy dealers’ rep melted under the national TV spotlight … only to rise from the gravy grave and become an iconic, universally-beloved everyman. Celebrated on episode 62.

Running Drawing

running drawing

One hero’s quest to draw dongs with her workouts. Best use of wearable tech ever. Mentioned on episode 57.

Sad Full House

A brilliant concept highlights the very special-ist moments in the archetypal 90s sitcom. Discussed on episode 58.

Saturday Morning Slow Jams

Who knew Duck Tales could make for such a saxy jam? This series brought some classic anthems into a very smooth atmosphere. Discussed on episode 51.

Serial

serial podcast

Earth’s most popular podcast has taken us on an unforgettable deep-dive into a 15-year-old murder case. We may never know for sure what happened, but Sarah Koenig’s storytelling is for sure amazing. Discussed on episode 63.

Shia LaBeouf Live!

We hated Rob Cantor’s 29 impressions hoax (above) but we LOVED this Halloween spectacular with an amazing cameo at the end. Discussed on episode 62.

Sochi Olympics Opening Ceremony

So much to love at the outset of Putin’s propaganda games. We loved the TATU performance, the torch-carrying by Putin’s mistress, and all the crazy puppets — yet the Police Choir stole the show with their take on “Get Lucky.” Celebrated on episode 46.

Solange Attacks Jay-Z

America’s favorite family feud of 2014. #TeamSolange. Discussed on episode 52.

Star Wars Teaser Trailer

Fanboys rejoice! Black stormtroopers, new droids, sexy scavengers and a controversial new lightsaber. STAR WARS, Y’ALL. Discussed on the forthcoming episode 64.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on Oprah

This jawdroppingly weird event was unearthed from a forgotten VHS cassette and placed online for the delight of all. Discussed on episode 52.

“Tom Hanks” by Buckwheat Groats

America’s dad turns to the dark side, wielding Uzis and blow in this amazing, Jibjab-like rap video. Discussed on episode 49.

“Too Many Cooks”

 

Too late, it’s already stuck in your head. Broth spoiled. Canonized on episode 63.

Verbatim

 

Brett Weiner’s short film brought a deeply weird deposition to unforgettable life. He joined us to fill in the backstory on episode 60.

We Still Coming

we still coming

The viral story was bogus, but the real deal was even better. America, 2014. Discussed on episode 56.

#YesAllWomen

Finishing off with some real talk. Misogyny — Don’t Do It! The hashtag movement to fight back against bigotry and violence was analyzed on episode 53.

That’s all folks. You are now ready to CAST YOUR BALLOT!

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About Alpine McGregor
Just like you, man. I got the shotgun, you got the briefcase. All in the game, though, right?

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